Thursday, January 24, 2019

Kate Turley * my mother * 1938-2019


* My remarks * January 22, 2019

A friend of mine recently relocated from Texas to  Panama actively seeking a better quality of life for her family.   Before moving, she had authored a book in which she encouraged the reader to Choose Joy.

Her theme was that there are certain things unique to all of us that bring us Joy.  And to experience that Joy, we have to Live Intentionally.  

I believe that Kate did live her life with Intention.   Kate always had a smile, a pleasant demeanor, and an easy friendliness with so many.  And who can forget  her unique sense of style?  But all of these good characteristics did not happen by chance.  She deliberately put herself out there to reflect the light and beauty that she saw in the world.

Because Kate certainly appreciated the beauty in life.  And to truly take in that beauty requires a seriousness, a focus, a desire to eliminate distraction.   We all remember Kate as a good listener.  Kate was a serious book reader.    When Kate looked at a work of art, she could ponder it in silence.  Those skills require an outward-facing focus. 

One specific memory I have is that Kate would regularly go to the symphony or the opera or the theater by herself.  She would usually go at the last minute.  Even if the performance  were sold out, she would nearly always be able to buy a single ticket.  I believe she liked seeing the performance by herself  because she was able to truly focus on the performance and take it in.    She would even say that if it got too intense, she would just close her eyes.

She had that purposefulness  in her everyday dealings as well.  She would listen attentively in the discussions she was part of.  She asked questions of others to keep the conversation moving forward.  And she never as far as I know held a grudge against anyone.   I believe that led to an ever-widening circle of friends, starting from the time she was very young growing up on Wickersham Lane here in Houston, and continuing forward for many years.    All of you here today can count yourselves in that large circle.  

On one of the last times we talked, she told me about a conversation she had with her mother Pearl Elledge late in Pearl’s life.   Pearl told her “I’ve gotten everything I wanted out of life.  I had a great husband.  I had two great children.  I’ve had a nice home and garden.”

I didn’t realize it at the time, but she of course was telling me that was her story as well.  She got everything she wanted out of life.  In that respect she Chose Joy. 

I am sure that her parting wish to you would be to: 
“Go and Do Likewise”

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